The Man of Steel

So a few weeks ago i was talking with Cizjut about the dissapointing efforts on "modernizing" Superman's costume, for me, Superman was always a timeless symbol of potencial, the ideal that everyone can be more if they make the effort, and his costume should not be changed just because some people think it looks funny, when a man can fly, shoot fire from his eyes and punch you to the sun, he could dress like a clown and i would not say shit about it.

Zack Snyder's "The man of steel", coming the next year features a "underwear-less" costume, with a retooled "S" symbol and some basketball-like spandex fabric for ALL the blue parts, it's not that bad, at least is better than Jim Lee's new SUPERARMOR for the DC's new universe.

to make story short: i made this as an effort to make the Superman's costume look like something a Kriptonian would wear, i'll do something Similar for batman soon.

and here is a alternative version:

The fuck is wrong with Rebuild 2.2?

You know, I took a looooong time to get around and watch Neon Genesis Evangelion for the first time back then (2006, 2007 i think), when anime was all the hype and everyone already watched it.
So back in the days, I wasn't really hyped about anime, last thing I watched probably was Dragon Quest and Saint Seiya and others, and got totally disconnected about the japanese animation. So a friend comes to my house and brings me the entire NGE series and the movie, "so fuck it, let's see what is this about, probably it's about girls in alarmingly scantly short skirts and annoying high-pitched squeals trying to save the world or something... like all anime in the world."

And oh boy, I got a japanese Stanley Kubrick's LCD trip. And god damn I loved it.

I was pretty impressed about the actual depth of the psychologic ride I was watching. I mean, I was expecting a much lower bar or just Mazinger Z with guuurls (and tiny scantly skirts), and I truly got an interesting story with interesting characters, with actual motivations and fears, around a sci-fi themed world. And with that, a deliciously ironic BAD END. Some people hated the "End of Evangelion" movie, moe fans rioted, people cried, most got confused as fuck. I thought there was no better ending than that one, considering all what happened in the story, and considering Hideaki Anno's crushing depression back then, it was not a surprise.

As far as anime goes, it's one of the milestones in japanese animation with a great story, and the characters are here to stay forever, wether you loved them, fapped to them or hated Shinji's coward ass and got you in the same mood because probably you got related to his fears and insecurities.
Fuck you Shinji.

But as far as the people buying NGE related hentai and figurines and related merchandise, and the otakus cosplaying as a tsundere Asuka, the ending was a combo slap across the face. And Anno got even more depressed when they complained about the ending.

Fast forwarding to these days, we hear Evangelion is getting a remake in a series of 4 movies, the first one called Rebuild 1.0, where it's more or less the same storyline as in the original series, with some of the filler gone and with the hints of not being an actual "remake" but being some sort of sequel, with the events of the end of the world being retold and giving Shinji a second chance in life to not fuck it up this time. The animation is better than before and Rebuild 1.0 delivers what it promised, the same story with slight changes to some details and more action packed. Ramiel looks awesome, and overall being pretty good. It's more obvious how Shinji is not so much of an emo and he looks like he's somehow grown balls, hinting again why this could be an actual sequel and not a remake, I repeat.

So Rebuild 2.0 arrives, and expectations are set. You know how NGE went, and you're set to watch another psychologic LCD trip. Hopefully this will deliver that second chance everyone wanted for the characters, and redeeming all of the mess the original ending did.

And then I watched it...
"What the... What was that? The fuck is this? The fuck is that? Why? Who the fuck is Mary? What's going on in here? Why are they becoming so moe for Shinji...? Where is the sci-fi story with giant mechs? Why are they... NUOH MY GOD THEY TURNED IT INTO EVERY OTHER JAPANESE ANIME EVER"

Ok follow me here:

Seriously why? At the very beginning, another EVA pilot appears fighting an angel and everything explodes with her barely getting alive, and we see her no more in the movie until halfway through, when she arrives at Shinji's school dressed in (a scantly tiny skirt) uniform and conveniently landing over his face. Her breasts flood Shinji's face in the clichéd "awkward" moment, and when they get up, this girl, named Mary it seems, with the fetish fuel design for glasses and brunettes, has a strong hard on for Shinji smell. Yes, his smell, she comments on how he smells nice. So the hentai writers can go wild on it.

Then farther in the movie the former strong and stubborn Asuka is fighting the autist clone Rei to cook for Shinji. And Shinji ignores them not because he's suddenly confident, but because he's now that clichéd awkward japanese kid in that awkward japanese cartoon, the one that gives you a hard time to explain to your parents what is it about.
And then Shinji shows he's attracted to everybody's favorite empty and devoid of any character or charm clone Rei Ayanami, and there's no argument for it. He just does. Maybe because japanese youth truly prefer submissive women, and there's nothing more submissive than an asperger syndromed autist.

Rei has always been just a plot device, in all the original series this character was just there to move the story forward, she got no development and certainly, she's got no development in the remake either. You could say Shinji likes her, but it makes little sense now and destroys the original concept of the story, or any chance to get the new story interesting.

The why is pretty obvious, Rebuild 2.0 was made to scrap everything before it and turn it into a profitable merchandise seller, fanservice ahoy, without any shame whatsoever, like the new plugsuit that looks like bondage latex and had no actual purpose for introducing it other than watching Asuka undress. Then she's removed from the scene by an abduction, because her character needed development by this moment and "fuck that, we want more autist sex innuendos".

From there on, inconsistencies with the characters and the plot get more and more obvious, like the introduction of Mary and her character having no actual impact on the plot, and the will to rewrite NGE and turn it into another Gurren Lagann is set in stone to never discuss what the original NGE series was about.

And in the end of the day, it's not about Rebuild 2.0 being "bad"(because somewhat it is), but if you were looking for any other anime on the market and stumbled upon this you could say it was ok. If you actually liked the original story, characters, and concepts that they were developing with new animations and the CHANCE to redeem the original grim and depressing ending into something more awe inspiring, they blew it, and now what we have here is just wasted potential. This is what actually bothered me after watching Rebuild 2.0, and opinions and actual product may vary, and you may agree or disagree here.

But in the true end of the day, we will always have Seikon No Qwaser.

The Smurfs

So, do you remember the show "The Smurfs" when you watched it on TV as you were a kid? Me neither, don't lie. Actually, I've never ever met anyone that actually liked the Smurfs so much to bring it to any conversation about anything ever. The Smurfs was one of those shows that kinda were "just there" between the awesomeness of Dragon Ball and other stuff. Everyone watched them, but nobody actually remembers what the fuck were they about, or any episode. Well there was Gargamel and he was evil and a wacky series of events unfolded as told as an epic quest for Smurf extract so he could be an omnipotent being... or something like that.

So imagine my wrinkled forehead and skeptic smirk when i was going to watch "The Smurfs: The Movie" on the theater. And my enormous surprise to find it actually good. I was actually having fun with it, an i didn't even knew why at the moment.

For the fans of gritty and in-depth thesis about the nature of a man, The Smurfs is not something for them. It's a light-hearted and funny family movie that actually stays truthful to the original stories and TV show, and if there is indeed a Smurfs fan out there fear not for this adaptation to the big screen.

Seriously, besides the sometimes cringeworthy "smurf" addon to any phrase the characters say (SMURFTASTIC, YOU SMURFED WITH THE WRONG SMURF, SMURFING SMURFHOLES, I WILL SMURF YOUR ASS-ok you get the idea) and besides the rapping scene with the little characters - because you can't leave a modern reference out of a new movie of course - , the entire ride was pretty funny, and Hank Azaria as the infamous Gargamel was, in my opinion, the best thing about it.

The whole script was done entirely to let people have a light good time where there's no any attempt to do anything else than bringing the original characters to this decade.

I'm actually glad to see something done right, even if i wasn't an entire fan of the source to be honest, but in my opinion, if you have little kids, cousins or brothers and want to spend a good time with them, or YOU just want to spend some time watching a movie, The Smurfs isn't a bad movie to consider, at all.


-Cizjut